I haven't posted in a while. Turns out having a kid takes up most of my time. I don't have time for this stuff anymore. I barely have time to take a shower. But I need to vent. I feel like this is here for that lately.
When are the people in my life going to drop their silly petty b.s. and open their eyes?! I am so tired of being made to feel bad about any choice my husband and I make for our family! Everything that we do, we do for ourselves. When weighing the pro's and con's we look at how it affects Ava. We don't look at how it's going to affect his mother, or mine, or my best friend, or his. We think, "what will this do for Ava?" After the things that have happened the past few days, we had a discussion this morning. My kids not knowing their family is not our concern when our families are negative, with bad attitudes. I have no reason to bring my kids around people like, family or not. Just because we share DNA doesn't mean I have to approve of everything you do and same goes for you... You don't have to like the choices we make but being that they are choices that only WE can make, you can respect them. Anyone that disagrees or doesn't like them can keep their nasty comments to themselves. Hang up on me because you don't agree, Fine. Threaten to cut me out of your life, and then tell a different version of whatever truth you have built up in your head... also your choice. When it backfires, it's not my problem. I'm so tired of people acting out, lashing out, and then looking for pity and sympathy by trying to turn the whole situation around on someone else. Take responsibility for your actions.
My husband and I have decided to move our family to California. We have the opportunity to rent a house for less than what we are paying in North Dakota. On any given month between our rent for a 3 bedroom house, the utilities (heat, water, garbage) to make the house live-able we pay anywhere between $2000 to $2500 a month. That does not include our cell phones, cable, internet, gas money, groceries or any other expenses that we have. That's a large portion of our income. We have not been able to establish a savings account because of this. We live pay check to pay check with an income that we should be living quite comfortably. I am stubborn, and very independent. So much so that it is very difficult for me to stay at home all the time because I feel like I need to contribute financially. My husband assures me that by staying home, raising our kids I am contributing. And it took me a very long time to see his income as OUR income. I don't like to take things from other people. And I can't even begin to tell you how completely over the top pissed off I am to have someone who's supposed to be there no matter what tell me I've been bought and paid for. Talk about calling the kettle black... I've had a job since I was 14 and only had one year where I didn't work because of the economy. Which brings me to WHY we have moved as far from Michigan as possible. In Michigan my husband made $9/hr and was lucky to break 30 hours a week. With the agreement that our kids would not go into a daycare, ever... we moved to North Dakota. No one was happy about this. But people pick up and move their families all the time. We're doing what we want to do. Why? Because we're adults. We're married to each other, not to any of you that feel it's necessary to shove your opinions down our throats. We don't live in Michigan anymore. Accept it. And, if you can't... then quietly deal with your issues on your own. Anyone that is negative or rude, or decides to say anything negative or rude about me behind my back is no longer going to be speaking to me or my family. This "family" issue has been on going for YEARS. I am tired of it. I don't go around, and haven't, for almost 10 years, if not longer. I have avoided family parties, holidays, gatherings, birthdays. The only thing I show up for are my nephews. They're innocent and should NOT be burdened by any of the crap that's going on between any of the adults. There's always something going on, or being said about someone by everyone. There's isn't one guilty person as it takes two people to create any situation. However, a situation can be blown way out of proportion by over reacting and not thinking things through. Everyone needs to take a step back from everyone else and worry only about your own issues going on inside your house. Nothing else is any of your business. What my husband and I decide to do is not anyone's business. But if we choose to tell you or try to, before being hung up on... and you don't hear the entire situation - you have absolutely zero ground to stand on when opening your mouth up about anything. This goes for every single person I know. If you don't know what's happening directly from my mouth then I guarantee you don't really know the truth about what my family has decided to do.
I am going to take care of my family. And if that means moving to California... Then we are moving to California. If anyone doesn't like our choice, that's your personal issue and I refuse to address, acknowledge it or discuss it. If you're not on board, you're out. Simple
disclaimer: this is not directed at any one specific person, just to anyone that has an issue with how my husband and I raise OUR kids and run our family.
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